SOBER FUN

Currently in society "fun" is associated with drinking and using .

Every occasion in most households is incomplete without opening the bottle.

By the time it reaches the stage of addiction drinking and using is no longer fun but is indulged in to keep away pain.

There would be a glass in hand or a nip hidden in the socks when going to watch a movie or a match or picnic . No meal is eaten in a restaurant that does not serve alcohol. A party that does not serve alcohol is not considered worth attending .

Years spend in keeping away pain and the old association of fun with drinking and using leads to a loop of wanting to experience the same feel of fun without alcohol . With this presumption the old hangouts like pubs and restaurants and clubs are frequented but without drinking . However , without intoxication these very places and the company of others who drink and use are not so attractive . The same feel is not achieved which leads to disappointment . Frequenting the same places expecting a different result is the illusion and soon enough the person ends up drinking or using .

It is thus , very essential to include fun activities within the treatment program.

A voluntary system like ours promotes these very activities. Regular life does not only include work, study and family .. A very major part is time spent with oneself and entertainment .

Along with an inner transformation that is required to take place during residential rehabilitation treatment , new likes and hobbies and activities need to be adopted. Part of therapy should be to enable the client to experience that which seems like “normal” entertainment activities like going out for movies, meals , trekking, hiking, reading, art , music, karaoke .

When out on a movie with a client he shared that it was the first time in years that he had gone for a movie without being under the influence of alcohol or weed and that the realisation that he is having more fun without the substance was a revelation to him!

Likewise, another client of ours who was addicted to heroin and socialising over alcohol in pubs as a way to socialise in the European country she came from , realised that “ there is so many stuff to drink apart from alcohol”

For another client going on a picnic meant first filling the car trunk with booze the previous night making sure one would not fall short of liquor, the people and place is secondary. In the treatment process going on a picnic meant planning the place and the food to be taken or eaten.

Singing Karaoke would usually be in a Karaoke bar drunk or stoned and a lot of songs have associations with being intoxicated. In such a situation Karaoke singing in the treatment as fun

Thus there is a perspective shift.

It is very essential for these practical experiences to be a part of the therapeutic residential rehabilitation treatment process

SEXUALITY AND INTIMACY IN ADDICTION

Humans are sexual beings. Sexuality includes physical, psychological, social, emotional and spiritual aspects. It does not only mean the act of sex but the energy of sex and the awareness of humans as sexual beings. Intimacy is building a close rapport, companionship and friendliness with another person.
Sexuality arises in infancy when the infant plays with its genitalia – repression/suppression of this most natural energy begins then itself by parents scolding the infant. In puberty, attraction to the opposite sex reaches its peak, but the topic is taboo in family/society. Religious beliefs complete the vortex of fear, guilt, shame and suppression. Perversion sets in as pornography is resorted to as an educative tool. Add drugs/alcohol to it and the psychological degeneration, delusion and self abuse that sets in is immeasurable.
In a suffering dependent, issues related to one’s sexuality are very extensive and deep rooted. This is not addressed in most treatment programs across the world, let alone in India. However, amongst the various relapse factors, sexuality issues rank amongst the highest.
The drinking /using might have begun as fun, experimentation, peer pressure etc. As it reaches addictive usage there has been a breakdown of most intimate relationships like husband/wife, parent/ child, partners/friends etc. in the cycle of wanting to drink and use and the repeated lies, the deception and the manipulation involved in perpetuating that habitual cycle. The intimacy with oneself has itself collapsed. Any attempt at intimacy by others is also thwarted as it is a threat to one’s usage or it is initiated to enable using or initiate sex.
Alcohol and drugs reduce inhibitions and increase sexual drive. As inhibitions drop with intoxication, promiscuity and unsafe sex is indulged in. The duration of the sexual act from initiation to orgasm lasts longer under intoxication, giving the illusion of it being greater, but though the drive and desire is high, the performance is affected.
Treatment
Considering the sensitivity and the importance of the issue, it is essential for it to be addressed in an unprejudiced, accepting ambience, maintaining confidentiality.
The person identifies and deals with areas of conflict from childhood, adolescence, adulthood and addiction through writing, detaching emotions from incidents. Counseling helps resolve them; meditation enables and sustains growth of awareness. He or she learns how the substances used affects/ afflicts sexuality and performance and what change can be expected in recovery.
It is of paramount importance that the person’s significant other (co-dependent) also receives the same treatment for his/her sexuality issues.
The individuals find freedom from shame, fear, guilt and anger related to sexuality.
Rebuilding Intimacy, Sexuality and Sexual Relations Post-Treatment
The individual is still coming to terms with a life away from the substance, but has experienced joy and is at peace with himself/herself, free from physical and emotional pain. Rebuilding relationships and redeveloping lost trust and intimacy with loved ones is worked through with guidance from a therapist.
Many might have had most sexual experiences under intoxication. Experiencing sex anew can open up other issues. For example, the intercourse may not last as long as it did under intoxication, or medical issues like premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunctions, secondary infertility etc may arise. All these can be resolved through counseling and medication.
We at Anatta are probably one of the only centers in India that addresses and deals with issues related to sexuality in addiction and co-dependency in its entirety in an ambience that is open and accepting through counseling, writing and meditation enabling truly holistic healing

GOING BEYOND EMOTIONS

Man lives in his mind.
Most of his activity revolves around the mind. As a result the body has been neglected and the unity of mind body has been shaken. The result- stress, emotional angst etc... we color every experience with emotions , thus deluding us from reality.
Have you ever eaten something very delicious and wanted to hold on to that taste ? For that, if you stay hungry and do not brush your teeth the whole day..what do you think will happen? The next morning, you wake up hungry, stinking  and grumpy and the taste that one so wanted to hold on to is now only in the mind...  this is exactly what we do with our emotions .. Whether happy or sad, we tend to hold on to them till they raise a stink....
We find ourselves living in more than one mind at a time trying to think why another person behaved in a particular manner , what will people think  if I did this etc. ; living in one mind itself is tiring , imagine living in multiple minds- exhausting!
In addiction  , the addict is at an advantage because the problem is so in the face that he has to do something about it. With the rest of the world the proverbial carpet is ever present.
But do things actually get brushed under the carpet? The incidents will, but the emotions are held on to in a conscious or unconscious form either suppressed or repressed... which then colors all our responses to incidents in our lives.
Thus, we can conclude that it is our emotions that are behind every so called “ issue” in our lives. “Gurus” tell us go beyond emotions, detach ourselves from emotions, be in the present, renounce our relations, material things etc but can we “renounce” our minds? And HOW do we go beyond all our emotions?
Our mind never allows us to see reality as it is, for, it takes us to the past and the future [ both non -existent]  thus enabling us never to  be in the present. A story- two monks come across a woman waiting to cross a river. One of the monks volunteers to help and carries the woman across, lets her down and goes his way. The younger monk begins arguing for 3 hours about how could the monk touch a woman , it is forbidden in their sect and is a sin… the older monk quietly tells him,  I dropped off the woman 3 hours ago..I see my friend, that you are still carrying her... this, is what we do with all our emotions.
The ability of going beyond emotions is inherently present within each of us, we only have to become aware of it and live it.
A few methods we incorporate :
Writing
The writing is in a prescribed manner. We write all the incidents in our lives as they happened  , without embellishments or adornment  of philosophy and retrospective analysis. It is describing the incident as it happened. Then, to make it more interesting write down the emotions you felt at the time separately. Also add the emotions you feel now when writing the incident. If you sit with yourself for at least 45mins everyday and keep writing all the incidents in your life in this method ; slowly you will realize that you develop a detachment from the emotions one has held on to over the years.
Meditation
Regular practice of meditation releases suppressed and repressed emotions stored in our cellular memory and changes the structure of our brains, reducing the size of the areas that cause emotional fluctuations thereby changing the responses to stressors around us ; the areas of our brains that regulate compassion and empathy increases in size. Meditation keeps us in the present moment.
Yoga
Yoga balances the interiority of an individual ,keeping one in the present enabling an increase in awareness of our body and mind.
Being present
Extending this practice of being present to everything we do in life. While eating eat , while drinking water drink, while walking, walk.... cut out the multitasking.
Being present and doing all of the above to do so , eventually, helps us to deal with incidents in our lives without attaching emotions to them and seeing them in all their reality and we learn to truly “respond “ instead of “ reacting”.

We at Anatta enable this ability to go beyond emotions to surface and provide the tools to maintain it because we are one of the finest rehabilitation treatment centers in India.
Get speedy recovery from drug and alcohol addiction with the top drug rehab center as well as top alcohol rehab in India. We are only a phone call away.

ARE YOU LIVING A NIGHTMARE THAT IS NOT YOURS?

A person starts to drink in the company of friends, at a party, or with one’s father, as an “introduction to manhood”. One feels good, on a high, inhibitions reduced. It becomes easier to say things you would otherwise have not said; talking to the girls becomes much simpler and fun; suddenly one becomes the life of the party.
The desire to feel the same high continues but the same intake of the substance does not achieve this, as the body has developed a tolerance. The quantity of consumption increases.
At the job deals are closed over “entertaining “with alcohol. Problems at work lead to increased consumption. Managing home and work becomes stressful.  The same “high” is not attained, hence the quantity increases. At this stage the family, whether, the wife or the parents start feeling alarmed and start admonishing and asking the person to cut down on the drinks. This is a stage of problem drinking.
Slowly ,  the weekend consumption  becomes daily; from 2-3 pegs it becomes 5-6 or more. Social meetings, family dinners and work meetings are arranged around the availability of alcohol.  Instead of using alcohol, abusing it begins. Sexual desire increases and risk behaviours increase. This happens insidiously. This is Alcohol Abuse.
Then the nightmare unfolds for the person. The thought processes change. Incidents get colored by emotions that are exaggerated, like watching a movie on a 100mm screen. Identification develops with the personality that has changed due to the alcohol. Suspicion and paranoia set in.  He wants to have only 4/ 5 drinks but loses count after that and before he knows it, he is a bottle down. He decides, he will not drink today but in 5 minutes or 5 hours, he finds himself with a glass in hand. He has just gone for a walk after an entire day of not drinking eating healthily, having a nice time with family, before he realizes he finds himself in a bar 4 drinks down. The mornings are terrible, the body unsteady shaking, tremors, a mind befuddled with last night’s hangover, and no memory of how he reached home, whom did he meet, or has he gotten his car back [ “Blackouts” – the person has absolutely no memory of  his words and actions , of what has transpired while he was drunk ] This increases the terror that arises within, giving a sickening sinking feeling – which is then appeased with another drink to stabilise.. Or, months can go without drinking [untreated] and suddenly without warning he finds himself drinking again. This is Addiction to alcohol, the drink consumes he person, and he loses control of the drink and his life.  Thus, he is living a nightmare that he is unable to wake up from.
 The family pulls themselves into this nightmare trying to control his drinking without understanding that treatment is essential at this stage in the form of residential, voluntary, rehabilitation. They lose their identity and identify themselves with his nightmare; [Co dependency] they require as much help.
On reading the above do you identify with the experience of the nightmare that the person drinking is going through? Then,You need to visit drug & alcohol rehabilitation centre.
Or, do you identify living with a nightmare that is not yours?  Then,You need help too.
AH provides a voluntary, residential care in an exclusive ambience, with non –medically, with meditation and counselling techniques as cornerstones of therapy along with other alternate life therapies. It is one of the best alcohol addiction treatment centres.
Help is available through addiction treatment centres, which is just a phone call away.